an american film from the 90’s

Hi,
I’ve been searching for this movie unsuccessfully for years.

I only have vague memories about it but it was an american film from the 90’s.

A part of the plot is about a secret behind the wedding of a man, mostly told in flashback.
A met his wife on a drunk night or something, married her very soon and then discovered his wife was in fact a man or a transsexual, which I remember cause it was a kind of a stupid plot.
Yet the movie was serious, some sort of drama/thriller.
In the end, a dark haired woman is burning a paper with a name (sitting in the back of a car).
This paper was the only proof of something and came from a mailbox or a doorbell.

Thanks in advance for your help.

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